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1. I will eat more chocolate. Sorry, Dr. Atkins, but I believe it's un-American to go on a diet that forbids M&M's.
2. I will see more children's movies, even though I don't have kids. When most Hollywood schlock aimed at adults is too juvenile for words, it's a kid movie like The Incredibles that turns out to be the cleverest film of the year.
3. I will not vote for another President for four years or refer to states by color.
4. I will enjoy myself more. This shouldn't be difficult, since I'll be avoiding politics, eating more M&M's, and watching cartoons.
A list of resolutions
I truly believe I can keep
It is bad to suppress laughter; it goes back down and spreads to your hips.
-Unknown
President Ulysses S. Grant was once arrested during his term of office. He was convicted of exceeding the Washington speed limit on his horse and was fined $20.
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