Police Story
A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street.

"But officer," the man began, "I can explain."

"Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back."

"But, officer, I just wanted to say--,"

"I said to keep quiet! You're going to jail!"

A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Lucky for you that the chief's at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back."

"Don't count on it," answered the fellow in the cell. "I'm the groom."
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"Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage.  He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn't have to hear about the way his mother cooked."
-- Unknown
It is against the law in Oregon to get married in your bathing suit.

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