A Trip to the Park
A police car pulls up in front of Grandma Bessie's house, and Grandpa Morris gets out.

The polite policeman explained that this elderly gentleman said that he was lost in the park ... and couldn't find his way home.

"Oh Morris," said Grandma, " You've been going to that park for over 30 years! So how could you get lost ? "

Leaning close to Grandma, so that the policeman couldn't hear. Morris whispered, " I wasn't lost ... I was just too tired to walk home."
Don't get your knickers in a knot.  Nothing is solved and it just makes you walk funny. 
~Kathryn Carpenter
In Lefors, Texas it is illegal to take more than three swallows of beer at any time while standing.
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