10. You have the Horticultural Hotline number on your speed-dial.
9. When attending your children's soccer game, you check for crabgrass.
8. You'd turn down a job transfer to a city with a shorter growing season.
7. You know the precise botanical name of every plant in your yard, but have difficulty remembering the names of your spouse and children.
6. You buy beer for slugs.
5. Your children's hair has been clipped into topiary forms.
4. At parties, you've been overheard discussing the pros and cons of sterilizing garden soil in your oven.
3. You enjoy receiving a load of well-rotted manure for a special occasion.
2. Your bumper sticker reads: "I brake for worms," "I'd rather be weeding," or "Have you hugged your cactus today?"
1. You're disappointed to learn that you can't order vegetable seeds from L.L.Bean.
Quality drops fast once overwintered root crops, such as carrots and parsnips, resume growth in spring. Harvest and use them now before warm weather gets them growing again.
A perfect summer day is when the sun is shining, the breeze is blowing, the birds are singing, and the lawn mower is broken.
- James Dent
